Well for all you recruiters out there I need some advice about honesty. I really want to serve my country and feel for a variety of reasons that the Marines are the best choice but I have an ethical snag. I'm right out of high school and gay (not openly by any means) and am worried that even if i adhere to the "Don't Tell" section of the rule that when they do the background check on me and ask neighbors and stuff about me someone might let it slip that they suspect me.

So i guess my question is can hearsay be used to keep me from becoming a Marine? Also, if i check the box that says i'm straight and someone tried to use the gay thing to turn me in can i be punished before even having a chance to join?

Dayum Kid, thats one helluva bombshell to drop in this forum. I've seen a lot of offbeat questions here and this one is really up there. But after thinking it over this is really no different than a lot of others so here goes.

It's not about what we think as no one can tell you where your heart is in becoming a Marine. Thats between you and God. All I can recommend are two things:

1. Keep your mouth shut about it at the MOT (moment of truth) in boot camp and don't sweat anyone saying anything because the background check is thru the local crime computer.

2. Play it cool and just be yourself on active duty because if you're overly macho you'll out yourself sooner or later.

I've known some Marines who happen to be gay and they did very well while others who were Gay Marines came up really short because they put their sexuality ahead of their commitment to their Brothers and thats a big no no. You're there to serve, not make social statements where it's basically a non issue as long as you don't flaunt it.

Just do your best daily and everything will work out well for you as it has for so many who came before you. I'd still trust my life with those Brothers because they had everyone's best interests at heart, not just their own. Always remember that it's your character that defines you as a human being, not your sexual orientation. Best of luck in whatever life path you take.

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Originally posted by Breton331:

Also, if i check the box that says i'm straight and someone tried to use the gay thing to turn me in can i be punished before even having a chance to join?

I just got sworn in Friday at MEPS - and I never remember having to check any box regarding my sexual orientation, and I dont remember any of the service counselors or staff ever inquiring about my sexual orientation. I think thats part of the whole 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Policy. I dont really see what the big deal is, but Id imagine you might be the subject to some hazing or jokes if you came-out.

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Originally posted by Hopefully0300:

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Originally posted by Breton331:

Also, if i check the box that says i'm straight and someone tried to use the gay thing to turn me in can i be punished before even having a chance to join?

I just got sworn in Friday at MEPS - and I never remember having to check any box regarding my sexual orientation, and I dont remember any of the service counselors or staff ever inquiring about my sexual orientation. I think thats part of the whole 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Policy. I dont really see what the big deal is, but Id imagine you might be the subject to some hazing or jokes if you came-out.

Going to just tell it to you straight. If you keep your gayness to yourself I doubt you will ever have a problem in the Marines. Seeing your screen name though makes it seem you want to go to an 03 unit. Just be prepared that in the field its not uncommon from grunts to make gay jokes about each other. Its all in good fun, but if you dont have a good sense of humor you are in for a long few years.

I personally am not a fan of gay's in the military, but that is my personal issue, but one that is fairly common especially in victor units. I respect your decision for wanting to serve though, if you are going to do this then best of luck, keep your head low, keep a sense of humor and most importantly dont hit on another Marine.

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Originally posted by Hopefully0300:

quote:

Originally posted by Breton331:

Also, if i check the box that says i'm straight and someone tried to use the gay thing to turn me in can i be punished before even having a chance to join?

I just got sworn in Friday at MEPS - and I never remember having to check any box regarding my sexual orientation, and I dont remember any of the service counselors or staff ever inquiring about my sexual orientation. I think thats part of the whole 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Policy. I dont really see what the big deal is, but Id imagine you might be the subject to some hazing or jokes if you came-out.

I also enlisted on friday (june 6th) and was never asked about my orientation. other than signing the harassment policy (which states information about being discriminated agianst and what coursr of action you should take) no one went any further than that. so good luck and like redwhiteandtrue stated make sure you keep a good sense of humor.

gods speed to all

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I'm right out of high school and gay (not openly by any means)

Don't ask, don't tell has specific meaning. You already told. It is still against policy for gays to serve. So, in all honesty, I'd have to say, find another way to serve your country.

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Originally posted by ipscone:

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I'm right out of high school and gay (not openly by any means)

Don't ask, don't tell has specific meaning. You already told. It is still against policy for gays to serve. So, in all honesty, I'd have to say, find another way to serve your country.

Exactly what I was thinking.

Thank You Mr. Ipscone! You're Dead ON!!!

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So, in all honesty, I'd have to say, find another way to serve your country.

Yeah, like join the Navy!!!

If you do join don't hit on other Marines. I had this guy at MOS school that had to of been gay. Definitely creepy when you feel like another man, a fellow Marine at that, is eyeing you up. It's definitely not a morale booster.

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Originally posted by wannabean03:
Thank You Mr. Ipscone! You're Dead ON!!!

STFU Turd, your opinion counts for nothing here.

Actually, I think DADT applies to the "asking" and "telling" either during the enlistment process or to people of authority/in your chain of command. I don't think the guy can be considered to have "told" in that context for disclosing this on an internet forum.

This is a policy that is specifically designed to not dig too deeply into someone's personal life - which means the military won't, and they don't expect you to either. It's very contrasting to the rest of the enlistment process, where you're expected to disclose all.

That said, if you keep it to yourself and be a good Marine, there should be no issues. Be advised that the military is not exactly "open-minded", so if you let the cat out of the bag, your life will not be fun.

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I don't think the guy can be considered to have "told" in that context for disclosing this on an internet forum.

I'm pretty sure that DADT means don't go public with it either.

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I'm pretty sure that DADT means don't go public with it either.

But if you're non-obligated and not yet a Marine, I don't think it matters, especially on the internet, where trying to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that someone is who they claim to be and actually IS gay would probably take a subpoena to an internet service provider for the identity and more than something stated on a web forum. If it's something as important as booting someone from the service, I think it'd take more than what he (or she" has posted here.