Hello!

I'm going to Iraq in a few weeks and as a single college student my parents and little brother are the only people I really feel like I need to help prepare for the deployment- but i dont really know how since I'm the first in the family and in our group of family friends to be in the Army.

We havent talked about it much and I try to make it sound like it wont be a big deal and safer than it sounds. I just don't know if that is wise since I'll be a line medic for a bunch of truck drivers. But my dad becomes quite emotional when he is worried so I want to make my job sound as benign as possible and have been lying that I'll be working in a hospital.

How helpful has talking to friends been? My parents dont really want to tell anyone outside of immediate family about the deployment, I'm sure they have their own reasons but I can't imagine trying to go through everything alone like that.

and i was wondering...Any ideas for the 13 year old little brother. He has a good head on his shoulders but I think he's prone to starting a rebellious streak soon!

I just wanted to know from some parents who have been through this what you guys need or want from your kids. Thanks!

btw, I dont think I could go through being a military mother! you guys are the strongest ever!

Wow, can I adopt you? My son didn't really act like he thought my concerns needed to be addressed. What I needed was a tentative timeline. (Subject to change of course). Like when to expect the first letter, phone calls, when I might get a mailing address, etc. Lots of this he probably didn't know for sure, the rest I think he didn't realize how important it was to ME. OR, he didn't care, not sure. Telling me what he needed me to send him. He really ticked me off when he kept saying, "I really don't need anything". Well, I needed to send him stuff! Give it to your friends or someone! CRIPE! Go over the fact that "no news is actually good news". So if they don't hear from you that means you aren't dead or injured, at least not at the present time. "Carefully" tell them about how military families are notified in case of injury or death, if they don't already know this information. Write as often as you can even if it's about stupid stuff. We like that. Take care of yourself over there! We Mom's like to hear our kids are eating well, working out and sleeping good. Lie if you have to! LOL

Well, Here's something that has helped me a great deal, before my son left I signed up for a myspace account and he did the same. This way if for some reason he couldn't call but was near a computer he could log on and leave me a message or atleast when he logged on it notes everytime he was on and when i do I can see when he last did. That always helps me know he's okay. We have 3 men in our family serving our Country, all have deployed and one was wounded. We are so proud of all our troops, give your parents my best and most of all Pray for them.

Hi-- I would suggest you talk with your folks. Let them know what your doing/ and especially tell them about all the good training you have had to go thru to get ready for deployment. Knowing that my son has years of training under his belt, helped me cope with him being in the sandbox. I was glad Jeff was up front with me about what he would be doing. Of course we can't give locations/ but I could pretty much figure out where he would be. Tell them you love them,,, they need to hear that as much as possible. Faithful is right/ the myspace "SKYPE" is great to communicate. We leave each other messages. If money is an issue with using the phone,,this solves that problem. You need to let them know that you prob won't write letters very often. When you do call,,just the sound of your voice will be like music to them!! Explain how tele calls could be monitored,,so don't ask information about locations, etc. Last but not least,,,,,, have them pop in here and visit with the other military parents. We have a great group !!

Take care of yourself.... you have a big job ahead.
We'll be thinking about you!!!
NavyMom Jean

As a mom I enjoying just getting a
"Hi mom, doing good, the food s***s, nothing to say talk to you latter."

It's hard for any of us to think about things to say sometimes.
So gettting just a quick one liner is reasurring.

18259318 ~ First and foremost, let me thank you for your service, and for being a medic, the most important job in the military.

I'm experiencing my son's first deployment (Afghanistan). He didn't say much about it before he left. He and I had an unspoken understanding. I was Air Force (Gulf War I). He's a Marine, Infantry. I knew he was going to experience things I had no clue about.

Your friends won't understand. Focus on communicating with your parents. The less your little brother knows, the better. "13" just can't grasp it.

I tell everyone I know that my son is deployed. I'm damn proud of what he is doing. He is providing freedom to those who cannot attain it themselves. We have Old Glory permanently anchored to the house. Yellow ribbon around the tree. And a bumper sticker proclaiming my pride in my son.

Thanks! you guys are great!

the advice was helpful, I've been trying to tell them that there won't be much time for emails and stuff so they won't worry if I don't write every day and be happy when I do. And I'll be sure to ask for lots of treats from home!

I'll try to keep the little brother as carefree as I can, he should be enjoying his more middle school years without worry.

good luck everyone, may everyone's family be safe. Thanks for being strong.

I'm going to say this as a mom who's son went thru a deployment while in middle/junior high school. I had just married my husband and 7 weeks later he was gone. Our Boy was 13 when Bobby left.....let me just say that no matter what--your little bro's gonna worry. He may not just pop right out and say it, but he will worry. Tell mom and dad to check into a support group for kids at his school. A lot of schools have them now and there could be one already set up. It'll help him to know that there are other kids going thru the same stuff he is, and he can talk and get things off his chest.
When you write/email/call--pay particular attention to him--even if it's just to harass him! After all, that's what big brother's do. lol....remember, he just wants to feel included on what's happening with you--and don't think for a second that he doesn't want to talk to you, hear your voice, want to know what you're doing....he may not say it outright, but he's interested.

Mom and Dad are grown and can process this stuff and can talk to other parents-and each other-about this stuff.....little bro will need special attention, okay?