Why did the chicken cross the road?


DR. PHIL :

The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.


GEORGE W. BUSH :

We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.


NANCY GRACE :

That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.


PAT BUCHANAN :

To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.


DR SEUSS :

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why he crossed I've not been told.


ERNEST HEMINGWAY :

To die in the rain. Alone.


JERRY FALWELL :

Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.


GRANDPA :

In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road and that was good enough.


ARISTOTLE :

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.


ALBERT EINSTEIN :

Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?


BILL CLINTON :

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?


AL GORE :

I invented the chicken!


COLONEL SANDERS :

Did I miss one?


DICK CHENEY :

Where's my gun?


AL SHARPTON :

Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

To peck you in the a$$!

JAG Officer:

The chicken crossed the road to avoid a criminal conspiracy indictment when he started marking time during which the biscuit rolled off the table and killed the LCpl.

LOL! good ones all! MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE!

....cause it was stuck on your d!@k......

To kick this kid's azz!!

"To Get From the Left to the Right!!"

Stripes

Because the chicken was an escapee from the "Pilgrim's Pride" farms.

Nah, Nah, Nah! You've got it all wrong I tell Ya! Mark Twain is right but that has more to do with why we are who we are than why that bird walked across the pavement... THINK! It's a bird that never learned how to fly... Therefore it must somehow be related to a certain Sparrow, we'll just call him "Jack" for now, So it's obvious that a certain Mr. Jones must have been near... Seriously though, someone needs to teach that kid that chickens aren't yellow bellied land-lovers... They are pissed off cause they really can't fly. It's all related to the potato chip skin because pickles have no bones... Truth is if you check the Date, time and Sat images you'll find it wasn't a chicken at all but one of my mates (probably Steve-O, if I know him... and I DO) reconning the local Chicks, hence the costume... Actually I think the real question should be: How many damn times can a chicken cross the road and not get hit? How are we supposed to make Chicken-a la-King if we have no road kill? Or is that S-O-S? Love you all as my family... Glad I finally found this place, Been gone WAAAAY to long.

Servo Vestri Phasmatis Nobis

UPDATE! 16624840 is Me... Didn't know my SN didn't update.....

Maybe this time it worked???