"Good Grief, when is enough enough?

MOM "
Oh yes, that is the question! Now we need an answer. I do remember a signature line "The beatings will stop when moral improves."
Just a note to MOM, I agree with you 100%, when is enough enough?!

I will cast no stones!

Dave Barker

your son is in my prayers as are all the troops both here and overseas.

doc stadig medic and proud of it

Thanks for the prayers. My son is home at the moment having returned last month from 14 months in the sandbox. He is doing well so far. It was truly wonderful to see him.

Take Care and hope you get some sleep tonight!!!

MOM

I believe love given is the secret of life...MOM

I was just playing Euchre on Yahoo Games where my sign on name is Soldierdansmom. My partner asked if Dan was deployed now. She has a son just called back as IRR after his discharge and a granddaughter serving as an MP in Afghanistan right now.

We exchanged that info and said we would pray for each other's families.

This JERK playing with us asked that we quit talking on the IM part of the game and play. We WERE playing just not fast enough for this sicko, cold hearted, jerk faced, punk brain.

Burned my butt big time.

How ridiculous that someone would think a friggin' card game online was more important than soldiers' families getting support and prayer coverage for their loved ones.

Honestly, I'm REALLLLLLLLY UPSET right now. All I can say is that "thing" would have faced the wrath of Xena Princess Warrior Mom if I coulda got at him, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Can't get much more shallow, self centered and disgusting than that in my book.

Talk about a PTSD "trigger" for a Vietnam "spitting years" vet like me !!!

Geez, I'm not doing too well here. Deep breathing Lynne, deep breathing.

Makes me sick,

MOM

I believe love given is the secret of life...MOM

[This message was edited by VietVetArmyReservMOM on Wed, 21 July 2004 at 4:56.]

[This message was edited by VietVetArmyReservMOM on Wed, 21 July 2004 at 4:58.]

prayers to you mom, sorry that you must deal with the ignoramuses with your stuff going on!!!

doc stadig medic and proud of it

God Bless You for the prayers and support. I really needed them.

That was a rough one for me. I think it was partially due to the fact that it was so unexpected that my "shields" weren't up. If nothing else, I have developed a great set of "shields" to stay away from triggers.

After my deep breathing, I went out into our backyard (it is a wooded park now, lolol, big summer project here for Alpha_Dog and I) and watered the baby grass, listened to the morning birds and tried to chill.

Unfortunately, NC is insect heaven in the summer heat and humidity and walked directly into two mega spider webs. I abhor spiders, lol and argggh.

Things got iffy soon after. Saw flashes of light before my eyes and tried to gut my way through it for awhile. Then, said....STOP NOW.

(I am infamous for gritting my way to worse health in general. Got "things" to do.....right???)

(WRONG!!!)

Anyway, I did come in, eat a good lunch and hit the bed with our beloved cat, a book and yes....bon bons, lolololol, in the form of Hershey's Chocolate and Reese's Piecees, grin.

I finally fell asleep and took a nap. When I woke up I felt drained but much better.

Triggers are nasty stuff. All in all I guess I handled the symptoms ok. Boy, do I remember the ole days when I didn't and they did nothing but escalate into true horror !!!

Your support means the world to me. I reallllly needed to write that post and receive some encouragement and help.

It's hard to feel better most of the time and then....WHAMMO, it returns out of the blue without warning. That's so discouraging.

We fight the same fight to cope and persevere ....over and over and over. Hard to keep an even keel and do what I need to do to dig myself back out and not deeper into my big black pit of the past.

Such is our lives now. Your caring means the world to me.

From the heart,

MOM

I believe love given is the secret of life...MOM

MOM if we could all get like the cat, we could handle all the stressors that came our way. I know you will come out ahead, because I know you and you have the support at home and on this forum!
We support you very much and you have our prayers going your way constantly!


PS: Way back there, I said my money is on the cat. Corrin my almost 10 year old said, quite simply "everybody wants to be a cat!" That quote was in her favorite movie "The Aristocats"

I will cast no stones!

Dave Barker

I'm giggling like a little girl myself after reading what your Corrin says and the quote from The Aristocats.

Ain't it the truth, ROF giggling with glee !!!

You make my heart feel good,

MOM

I believe love given is the secret of life...MOM

The world really is full of morons.

I don't know why I continue to do it. But it seems like everytime I go over there, somebody in P/CP is ticking me off. To put it lightly. Why do people get a thrill out of baiting and screwing with people?

Wish there was something we could do about these stinkin' trolls. Grrrr. Ruins my day.

POW/MIA: WHEN ONE AMERICAN IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO BE FOUND, WE AS A COUNTRY HAVE LOST.

quote:

---

Wish there was something we could do about these stinkin' trolls. Grrrr. Ruins my day.

---

Mods take care of the trolls. Some of the others just like to argue. Best thing to do is stay the heck away from their BS. That is all it is. Let them stay miserable.

Alpha Dog

Your observations are probably correct. People do stir up the pot just to see what reactions they can get from it. P/CP is a place for opposing points of view. It is what drives the forum and keeps poster activity there very high.

If everyone was in agreement, you would have moronic robots. LOL

The Moderators can keep the lid on some things but mostly they just keep someone from burning down the house. The Moderators serve to protect the management from liability. The User Agreement at the bottom of the forum page tells every poster what we can or cannot allow.

Moderators can tone things down better when posters issue a complaint that defines a problem that is in violation of the User Agreement along with the post link. Then the poster should back away from it and let the Moderators do their work. It won't always go the way you think it should. Moderators have to play by the rules too. Rule 6 of the User Agreement covers a lot of ground.

Posters have to use some common sense. People can bite off more than they can handle. People with PTSD issues posting on P/CP can be like children playing with matches who have also been chugging beer or sniffing glue. Sometimes it is a dangerous mix of things that should not be.

There are not any solutions that fix all the problems. Most things end in a compromise that moderates the damage to an acceptable limit. The management cares what the limits are but the posters have to avoid issues harmful to themselves.

Cherry

I must agree with your feelings, the media and some of the political advertisements really pull our triggers. I am so unhappy with the current degrading of our Armed Forces.
I am reminded of what it was like when I was discharged from the Navy. When I joined the Navy wanted us in uniform as much as possible. When I was finally discharged the Navy warned us to be very careful where we wore our uniform.
For any of the media, if it be advertisements, the news, talk shows or regular programs of entertainment, to demean our Armed Forces is a disgrace.

I will cast no stones!

Dave Barker

Boys writing home from Iraq, and I'm whinin' 'bout my crappy marriage.

quote:

---

Where does one draw the line?


I think my marriage is falling apart- my stepsons are forcing it apart.

My youngest stepson (the one that leaves for Iraq in a month or so) has been using my car. He damaged it. I told him that he could no longer use the car to go out on the weekends and after he got off duty- that his use would be limited to driving to and from his unit. My husband told me he agreed. It was partially his idea. We had a loooooong discussion about it. I brought up, during this discussion that our (step)son had mentioned that if we took the car away, that he'd move into the barracks. I remarked to my husband that I felt my stepson's motivation for saying this was to change our minds so we'd allow him to continue driving the car. My husband responded that he agreed, and furthermore, that even if he did move into the barracks, it'd probably do him some good.

So today, the stepson filled out the paperwork to move into the barracks, was assigned a room. Now my husband is saying that he never agreed to any of it, that he didn't want to take the car away, but that I was being "controlling" and forced him into it etc etc.
I have already been given the "What if *stepson* dies in Iraq, and you did all this mean stuff to him before he left, you don't really love him guilt-trip"

On top of it all, my husband will be gone all weekend on a trip, I will be stuck at home.

When I married my husband, both of his sons were of age. One lived at home, one was in jail. The one in jail got out, and had his own place for a time. He lost it, and we ALL moved into a home together.

I did not marry my husband expecting to be a MOM to his boys. They were grown. I knew they'd be a part of my life- I didn't expect them to be so involved. They are 21 and 25. I didn't expect them to live with us on and off, control every aspect of MY LIFE! I didn't expect them to ALWAYS have priority over our marriage.
I didn't expect to always come last.

I put my husband first in everything- I think that has been evidenced in a few of my posts. I put my husband before my career, my friends, I place the same importance on his happiness as I do mine.

But I am put last 90% of the time.

I know I am probably overreacting- but if feels like my marriage is imploding.
I know this can probably be at least partially resolved, but the earliest that will happen is on Monday. In the meantime, I have to sit and be miserable and hope that nothing happens to either my stepson or husband before we can all sit down and discuss this, and I can reaffirm that I love both of them.

I live in such deep fear of one of them dying while we are angry at eachother. I know why this is- based on irrational fears that date back to my father's death when I was 12- but that doesn't mean the way I feel isn't real.

At least Sunday I have group therapy. 2 days 'til then.

---

POW/MIA: WHEN ONE AMERICAN IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO BE FOUND, WE AS A COUNTRY HAVE LOST.

POW/MIA: WHEN ONE AMERICAN IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO BE FOUND, WE AS A COUNTRY HAVE LOST.

I don't normally post here but I decided to take you up on your offer you made the other night in the song thread to check out this and the ptsd open forum thread. While I was doing so I came across something that really shook me up pretty bad and decided not make a comment but I came back and have been reading everyones posts. When I saw your posts here I decide I did want to at least say something to you about Gail. I am so sorry that things didn't work out I can only imagine how you must be feeling. It looks as if you have a lot of people over here that are supporting you but if you ever want another friend to listen. I'm here. Hope things will get better for you.
Chris

"I firmly believe that any man's finest hour, his greatest fulfillment of all he holds dear, is the moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle - victorious"- Vince Lombardi

Chris, welcome to this Website. Thanks for the post support. This forum functions as a support group. I am concerned about your comment, "I came across something that really shook me up pretty bad and decided not make a comment". Sorry that whatever was posted hit you so hard. Glad you decided to come back and make a post comment. The Rant thread is for more negative issues. The Open Topic Discussion is for more positive support.

We do discuss some very important issues in an open and sometimes candid manner. I did want to tell you that your comments about how you feel would be welcome if you care to elaborate and speak of those feelings. We also understand the difficulty that may come with the effort to discuss issues.

We discuss feelings here. We are trying to be open about the issues under discussion. We do not always share the same point of view, but we don't trash other people or the posts of those we disagree with. Most of us can relate to the issues of others. We attempt to understand how people feel. We attempt to help each other.

The posts and threads on the forum are protected if need be from poster flaming. There has not been very much need for a Moderator to step in and do that. Our posters are a caring bunch of people who have decided to function as a support group. We try to help each other thru rough spots.

Please read our very simple but important special forum rules. Those rules were created so that people could discuss things in a more open manner. Welcome to our group, I hope you find the majority of posts here informative. I hope you decide that you can share your feelings whatever they may be. I hope you decide to stay.

Cherry
Scott Insley
PTSD Moderator

hello armymp glad you came. you will find this to be a very friendly place, like i told you. follow cherry's advice. don't worry about me and my problems. things will settle down soon, i hope. if you need to talk, you have my email addres and i am in this forum quite often. sorry i couldn't respond sooner, but i had a big problem going on at the time. SN for now.

cherry; thanx bro. lots of info like usual! greatly appreciated. glad you were here to answer her.



Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!

Thank you for the welcome. I'll probably be reading and not posting here.You guys seem like great support to each other. No worries about my comment I'm a tough gal I'll be fine. I can't really discuss anything about my comment. I should have never made it. It has nothing to do with you guys if I could I would be happy to share but the fact is if I were to discuss anything it would betray the trust of someone on mil.com who is very important to me. I can't do that. Again thanks for the welcome.

Ameeris- I actually did email you at your mil.com address the other day but I find that sometimes the mil.com email does not work so it's probably out in cyberspace somewhere.Hope things are going to get better for you soon!

"I firmly believe that any man's finest hour, his greatest fulfillment of all he holds dear, is the moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle - victorious"- Vince Lombardi

So I was down at the bike shop. My husband and I walked through the front door of the shop. I had just gotten off duty and was still in uniform. The guy working the counter says, "Wow. I thought it was Halloween. A soldier and a pirate." My husband wears an eye patch. He shrugged it off, so I just let it go.
Anyway, so this guy decides he is going to help us. He starts trying to push a leather jacket that I glanced at, but really didn't like. And he was really getting in my personal space, so I was gettin' agitated. I decided to take a step back and go sit with my son before someone "tripped" and fell into a clothes rack. So anyway, I'm playing silly mommy and doin' the goofy goo goo crap. I said something like, "You miss mommy when she is at work, huh? Well you go tell COL John Doe (names changed to protect, well heck, I just changed 'em cause it's my story and I can so there! ) to send Mommy home!"
The sales guy, civilian jerk-off, who is still breathing down my neck says, "They need to send 'em all home". Well, I gave the guy the benefit of the doubt and assumed that he meant well and was just trying to show support for the troops. So my response was a simple, "We've still got work to do." Not hostile or angry. In fact, I think I shocked myself with how pleasant I was about it.
He responded, "OH NO. Bush declared an end to all major combat operations. There must not have been anything more to do. Bush said so. He did his little P.R. stunt and landed on the aircraft carrier and had his big banner and everything."
I tried to bite my tongue, but this yahoo kept on and on with all his anti-Bush, anti-war rhetoric, I finally said, "Well. We did our job. Now we have to do the UN's job" and he got the picture and shut up.
He never did back off and go away, continued to be in our face.
I finally got so irritated, when we went to leave, I told the guy, "Most soldiers don't like it when you bad-mouth our boss and tell us what we are doing doesn't matter. Some of us still believe in fighting for freedom, Sir." and walked out.
I don't think I'll be going back in there anytime soon.

I guess I should look on the bright side; a year ago, I probably would have told the guy exactly where to go and exactly what to do, in less than lady-like terms. At least I didn't hit him. Heck, he wasn't even so big... LOL

POW/MIA: WHEN ONE AMERICAN IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO BE FOUND, WE AS A COUNTRY HAVE LOST.

POW/MIA: WHEN ONE AMERICAN IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO BE FOUND, WE AS A COUNTRY HAVE LOST.

Try being a shopper from hell. It is more fun.

Go back and visit the store again.
There are ways to get even with a retail clerk. Some of the best ways are to scatter merchandise by moving stuff around shopping and then haul a bunch up to the register. You run up a big ticket sale and then after something is rung up, question the price listed on the shelf with what the item is rung up as, then you say you don't know which way you are going to pay for stuff either cash or credit card so you ask the clerk to ring the stuff up on a receipt.

Then you decide to change the color of something but at a different price. The clerk has to void out the stuff and ring it all up again. Now the clerk usually has to answer to someone for the over ring on the register. Sometimes it even gets a clerk fired.

Then when the frustration of the clerk is high, you demand to see the manager. This makes this clerk real popular with management. You say this clerk has been rude to you since you got here. Then you write on the ticket, mechandise refused because the clerk was rude to you or next after it is all rung up waiting for some kind of payment, you look for the means to pay taking your time with it and then you say your credit card must be in the car or some excuse where you have to leave the store. You pretend that you can't find it. Then you say sorry, I shall be back soon and then leave the store.

Other ways to get even is go into a store and buy something cheap about $5 and insist on paying for it all in loose pennies. You see the clerk has to count the drawer at the end of the day. If you really got the time, miscount the money, start over a couple of times and then ask for help.

When you have had your fun.
Say hello again and have a good day from a Pirate and a dressed up soldier. Tell him that you enjoyed your little shopping trip and shall be doing it again soon.

Then I am a Scorpio, I don't get mad; I get even and maybe a little ahead.

Cherry

[This message was edited by cherryread on Sat, 09 October 2004 at 13:21.]

dang bro. sounds like you got some btdt. lmao



Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!