What's new? I feel so sick. I ate some
really bad stuff yesterday and I am not sure
what. Anyway too bad for me
Hey I have been working on a catalog site
with all my stuff. I didn't realize I have
almost 20 resources for bipolar disorder.
Anyway, check it out:-->This link is considered to be a 'solicitation' under the Terms of Service on this site, so it must be deleted.<--
Okay let get going.
I have to head out of my office
pretty fast today because I have a whole lot
of things to do but I wanted to write about
an important concept related to bipolar
disorder that you need to know.
Let me jump right into it. If you
are a supporter of someone with bipolar
disorder, and your loved one is not
stable, you can't look to this person
to make good decisions.
Sounds like common sense, right? Well
it should anyway, if this isn't common
sense then we really need to have a
serious talk. Anyway, even though this
should be common sense, many people
on my list make the huge and I mean
HUGE mistake of almost trying to rationalize,
talk to, look for answers to, wait for
a response from a person who is not
stable with bipolar disrorder.
This is absolutely positively amazing to
me.
Let me give you a couple of examples so
you kwow what I mean. Okay first one
comes from my family. Back in the
day right after my mom went into
her "mother of all episodes" she was
in the hospital and then was released
into an outpatient program.
While she was in this program (which
by the way was a total joke and terrible
as I look back), she would come back
home and scream and yell. She was totally
not stable. Anyway, I had taken her
c.redit cards away from her. Why? Because
I am a mean abusive son? NO. She had
over $30,000 of d.ebt and it was growing
super fast.
Anyway, I took them away right after she
first went into the hospital. My dad, on
the other hand wanted her to have them?
Why? Is it because he is crazy? He was
at the time sort of
.
It was because she wanted them and demanded
them and he would listen to her while she
was in her episode. It was super odd to
me. I on the other hand would never listen
to anything she was saying when she was
in an episode. Meaning, I wouldn't take
orders or ideas from her that were clearly
descrtructure and go along with her.
Okay it got even worse. So after I went
through and cataloged all her expenses,
it turned into about many pages of that
yellow paper with lines on it. You know
the one that I can't remember the name
right now. I think it's called a yellow
legal pad, (Duh, Dave...sorry I am tired).
Anyway I discovered that she not only owed
$30,000 in c.redit card debt. She owed tons
of other de.bts so I put a plan together.
After the outpatient program and when she
wasn't stable, she demanded to get her
c.redit cards back. She screamed and yelled
at me on my cell phone. She called me
every name in the book. Relentelessly
she beat on me. I never thogught for one
second to give them back.
Then her bipolar kind of game up on me
and she then put tons of pressure on my dad.
I shouldn't even say tons because she called
him a couple of times and he immediately
called me and said and I will never forget
this, "Shouldn't we just give her one
c.redit card?" I said no and hung up.
Anyway fast forward two years and when
I make fun of my dad and ask my mom,
"Looking back mom, are you glad that
I took charge and took your c.redit
cards so you couldn't spend yourself
into homelessesness?" She says "YES.
thank you."
If you met my mom and asked her this
she would tell you how her de.bts almost
destroyed her and she wished that I
took them away ealier. She is puzzled
as to why my dad would go along with
her and giving them back.
My mom kind of gets mad that my dad allowed
her to make bad decisions and didn't stop
her. My dad never stood up to her bipolar
disorder and I did. I am not trying to say
I am a super persn which I am not. I am just
trying to make a point.
Okay, I almost have to take off but one more
case study.
There's a person on my list. She called. Her
mother has bipolar disorder. She was to me
my father doesn't know what to do. I asked
even he went through my material which
he has access to (ton of stuff like
what's here:
She said no. He hasn't. He is waiting for
my mom to snap out of it. I said what?
She said yes he is waiting for my mom
to snap out of it. I said, she needs
to be put into the hospital. She says
well he (the father) agreed to never
put her into the hospital.
I was thinking, "who in the world
would make such an agreement with a person
who isn't stable?" Do you see the problem
here? Anyway to make a long story short,
the mother has bipolar disorder and is totally
unstable but the father who is the supporter has decided
to let the her make all the decisions? It's so strange.
I know your like "Dave that makes no sense." BUT I know
for sure there are thousands of people on my list
doing the same thing. It's not just them.
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/report11SUPPORTING A CHILD/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.bipolarparenting.comHAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?
Visit:
http://www.survivebipolar.netThe bottomline is this. Don't let someone who
has bipolar disorer control you and make decisions
that are destructive. Remember if the person
has bipolar disorder and is unstable he/she
can't make good decisions that's the entire problem
with the illness. If the person couldn't it wouldn't
be bipolar disorder.
If you have bipolar disorder, and you are stable,
you should do this immediatley. Have a talk with
your supporters and tell them that if you did
go into an episode not to listen to any descrtructive
things that you may say. Do yourself a favor and
set this up today. Don't wait.
Well I have to run I have soooooooooo many
things to do today.
Have you ever let someone with bipolar disorder
and isn't stable run the show and make decisions?
If so, please tell everyone your story. Don't
be shy I told you mine
PLEASE POST RESPONSES TO THIS EMAIL HERE
Your Friend,
Dave
