Ok, I told my recruiter I changed my mind, and I typed out a letter explaining why. I gave it to my recruiter (I saw on a website that that's how you're supposed to do it.) Before that I talked to him face to face. He & his boss refuse to let me quit DEP. They say they'll call my fiance in boot camp if I quit. I feel as if they're blackmailing me. Is this legal? I brought a stack of papers with me to the meeting, supporting that I can quit DEP. Is there anything I can do at this point? They are making me really angry, and I don't think trying to bully someone is the way to get them to go to the military. My recruiter had 4 other Marines at the meeting to try to talk me out of it. What am I able to do at this point? Please help. I have seriously thought this through, and though I know I should have made this decision BEFORE entering the DEP, I know this is my final decision. Any advice would be very helpful.

I'm sorry that you made that decision, and the more people are trying to convince you to stay by your word (as the DEP indicated), the less you're going to be willing to do it.

Technically nothing really will happen now as far as I imagine, since our Armed Forces are a voluntary force and you're not a part of it yet (unless you took the oath, did you?). But in the long term, I could imagine that government and federal jobs would be out of your reach. If you change your mind later on, you may not be able to re-join. That's as bad as it could really and actually could get, besided from the regrets that you may have that you didn't join. Good luck to you!

corpfan,

I'm in your situation. They can't retain you. You are under no obligation and can walk away.

You won't be barred from re-enlisting in the Corps or any other branch.

Also, try going to the state's USMC PA office.

http://www.militaryreporters.org/usmc_pao.html

There is a list of all of them.

hey guys...i'm in a similar situation as the original poster here. kinda similar at least - i wrote a letter to my recruter's commander requesting a discharge a couple of weeks ago, and haven't gotten anything back yet. my ship date is in 3 weeks. in the letter, i requested a delay in my dep status until a decision is made. what kind of oath are you talking about? the one where you swear into active duty? or the one that we all take at meps before getting into the dep (i think the oath there swears you into the inactive reserves)? i appreciate any help you all have. thanks.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Action_Junkie:
I'm in your situation. They can't retain you. You are under no obligation and can walk away.

You won't be barred from re-enlisting in the Corps or any other branch.

---

You are under no obligation, except for a binding contract and your oath to god and country.

The military chooses not to prosecute people who want out of their contract because we do not need honorless slugs in the World's greatest military.

Oh, and yes you can walk away, with your tail between your legs and your head hung in shame.

I guess the question I didn't see asked was why you changed your mind. My husband is Active Duty Army, my Father-in-law retired AF, and my Grandfather retired Army. With that said I personally met the Recruiter at the front door the day my youngest Brother-in-law was to depart for the MEPS Station to tell them he was not going. The reason? They had railroaded him into an MOS he did not want. The response from the Recruiter? They would send him to jail - he didn't have a choice - he was already in - they called another recuiter - they threatened to call Ft Huachuca and have the MP's come get him right then - threatened to to sue him for not fulfilling his obligation ---- then they asked to talk with "Carlson" at which point my soldier (E-7) walked out the door and handed them his military ID. We then offered to get the "retired" military members there in 10 minutes or less if they chose to continue their "threats".

It is not often that there are people actually in the military around to see such atrocities - but as I am doing a funding request through our Senator to help make some positive changes for the recruits and families, I would be interested in having your story in writing. Yours and anyone elses who has had ANY problems within the beginning 3 years recruitment and active duty.

Thank you for posting

quote:

---

Originally posted by stec74:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Action_Junkie:
I'm in your situation. They can't retain you. You are under no obligation and can walk away.

You won't be barred from re-enlisting in the Corps or any other branch.

---

You are under no obligation, except for a binding contract and your oath to god and country.

The military chooses not to prosecute people who want out of their contract because we do not need honorless slugs in the World's greatest military.

Oh, and yes you can walk away, with your tail between your legs and your head hung in shame.

---

Don't make the girl feel any worse that she already does... Why would you want someone to go to the military who, in reality, doesn't want to go? This person wouldn't make a good Marine, since she doesn't want to be on of the fewer and the prouder.

I resolved my situation. Month before shipping jitters is all it was combined with my ultra short temper. I kicked myself in the *** and squared myself away. Good to go, MCRD SD late November.

Corpfan, I ask you to please take the posts from medtronic, stec74, and the last post by action_junkie with a grain of salt. What you NEED to know, is that as a member of the Delayed Entry Program you are not under any OBLIGATION to swear onto active duty and go to basic training. The LESS THAN HONORABLE and sarcastic responses which these 3 gave do no good, and I don't see where that brings any more "class" to us currently serving. For what it's worth, I went through the same thing 10 years ago, when I got out of the Marine DEP to join the Air Force instead. I had to write my state senator to eventually have them release. The threats that some recruiters and recruiting districts use on "Deppers" is completely illegal and unethical. I have been a military recruiter now, for the past 7 years, and will tell you that your research was perfect, and you were honorable in notifying your recruiter and the recruiting command in the correct manner. It states right in our own recruing regs that members simply requesting a release from the DEP, MUST be released! But recruiters try to take matters into their own hands and do stupid stuff, and it's stories like this over the years, which makes it hard for the general public to trust military recruiters. For those of you who can only respond by trying to point out what a "coward" this person is, how do you think this makes YOU look? Any CHILD can act stupid on an anonymous message board. Just be truthful and address issues the way they need to be addressed.

Yes, please ignore my last post. Why should someone in the military believe in their or someone else's word? What is an oath, just words that you recite because you have to? Or does it mean something more?

If you do not believe in the Oath of Enlistment, then I do not want you in my military! If someone feels differently they are entitled to their opinion.

Action_Junkie
Good on you for sticking with it. Stay squared away and good luck.

NC1(SW)

... and you can keep the "MY military" crap. Now I beg you to please excuse the sarcasm from ME. But if it's one thing I can't stand is a "holier than thou" attitude. While serving in any branch or component of our nation's great military is honorable, everyone that serves is not honorable. While "Integrity First" is a great Air Force Core Value, people are people, and that's all they'll every be. So while taking the Oath of enlistment is "binding", so to speak, it is not final for someone entering the Delayed Entry Program. You reply to my post from the angle that I seem to care nothing about our military heritage, ethics, "what an oath means", and so on. That was not the point. The point is simple: As a "depper" this applicant is not obligated to do anything. So rather than attack the recruiters, excuse me, YOUR HONORABLE MILITARY COUNTERPARTS, for LYING, you and others challenge this person's character. Don't be quick to assume so much, especially if you don't know the whole story (case in point: my separating from the Marine DEP to join the AF). Maybe this guy recieved a full ride at a college somewhere. Who knows, and so what if he only changed is mind. As an active duty recruiter (now a Guard recruiter), I always made my deppers aware of this option. Most would say that's stupid as h*ll. To me, I was being honest and forthright. And because of MY character, I never had one single complaint from any applicant or parent in 6 years of recruiting. So I don't know "who's" military you're in, but if you can't see the dishonor in these recruiters' and/or supervisors' actions, then perhaps you're on the wrong team.

As a recruiter, then you should know that the reason that most people have second thoughts is cold feet. This usually happens within a month or two of leaving for bootcamp. A recruit will come up with a million and one excuses, all credible to him because it gives him an out.

I could take the easy way out and say "ok see you later", but I believe in tne Navy. So I will talk to the DEP member face to face and try to reach a solution. In the past year, I have only had one of my 53 DEP members leave DEP because they refused to obligate, he went and joined the Marines.

I talked more than half a dozen of my DEP members into staying in and shipping to RTC, many over a period of weeks. Not one single person that has gone to RTC from my station has not made it through bootcamp. This is what a good recruiter does.

I do not except "bs" reasons for not shipping, I ask why and solve the issues that face the recruit, then they go to bootcamp and become fine sailors.

A good recuiter tells an applicant they need to be sure with their decision before ever entering DEP, not "If you change your mind, that's cool."

Never forget that recruiters are mentors and counselors first, salesmen second. If you take care of your recruits, train them, mold them, then that is the biggest reward. Teach them that their word is their bond, that the Core Values mean something and aren't just words on a poster. This is what a good recruiter does.

I was raised that my word means something. I am raising my daughter the same way. Maybe if more people felt this way, the world would be a better place.

NC1(SW)

... and well put. It's hard to remember everything most of the time, when typing a post. Or you simply don't think to "cover yourself", but you're right, I too would always counsel any potential DEP loss, and "confront" them on their reasons for changing their mind. But please remember, my entire angle in this thread as been specific to the post! That's the problem with message boards. It's easy to get off on a tangent or bring up other issues. It is the ONLY reason why I discredited those "sarcastic" (as I labeled them) posts. Whoever the original poster was, was simply looking for an answer. All he wanted was the truth. He's obviously been getting so much cr*p from his recruiter and those bosses, that he's just looking for validation somewhere. So that's why I said just address the issue - answer the question and leave it alone if you don't know the whole story. Attack the character of your own deppers. You know them. You can't attack the character of someone's typed words. Well, you could, but what sense does that make? If I've heard it once I've heard it a million times: "well if blah blah blah, then I don't want you in my military." C'mon.

gaboundatlast -

thank you for responding as a recruiter to the posts here, even though the info you gave may lower numbers. it is nice to see a recruiter that speaks in terms of people and not numbers. i have been trying for weeks to get answers to my question, which is similar to the original poster here. funny thing is, i left it on the navy recruiter message board, and not a single one would respond. my question to you -

what should i do if my ship date is 10/28/04 (currently in dep), sent a letter (certified mail, return receipt) to my recruiters commander 9/16/04 indicating personal reasons and a career change for wanting a dep separation, and have received no response? is it true that all deppers requesting a discharge are released? that i don't even have to write the commander, that if i don't show up for my ship date, i will be released anyway with no negative consequences? i appreciate you time.

Sorry for the late reply - haven't been on the boards in a few days. I tell you what: If you've sent a CERTIFIED LETTER, what more can you do? This stuff really makes me mad, but hey, one dude can't change the world. Even though I'm not a NAVY recruiter, TRUST ME, ALL THE "REGS" ARE THE SAME WHEN IT COMES TO THIS MATTER: You are ONLY in the DEP, and you are NOT obligated to go! Yes, I am a recruiter, and you can tell them I told you so. Hey, I'm like a "sellout" in the recruiting world. But I have always been this way and I will never change who I am. It's a shame that recruiting commands all over the nation play games with folks like this. If everyone did their job with INTEGRITY, you wouldn't have the distrust we have today, and it could be easier to trust folks. I'm sorry I'm blabbing again. Listen: If you don't show up on ship day you will be DEP discharged. The MAXIMUM they can "hold" you in the DEP is 365 days FROM the date you originally swore in, when you first went to MEPS and took your physical. If you have to play hardball, play hardball. Now see, no one would ever think to take it this far, but if they call you and threaten to come to your house and get you, tell them to go ahead and come, but quickly call one of your local TV stations and see if they'd be interested in sending out a small news crew, to be waiting when your recruiter and boss arrived. Tell them you know the law and what they're doing is illegal. Bring up the fact you sent your certified letter with NO RESPONSE. Ask them if they want to respond PUBLICLY, and ON CAMERA to their actions and what's going on. The only way this can stop is for someone to get busted big time. OR........ you can take a don't care attitude to this whole thing, and not ever worry about it. Don't even stress. Don't show up, don't return calls, if they show up don't answer the door, whatever. If they want to treat you like they don't know you all of a sudden, he**, turn around and treat them the exact same way. People can respond to this and call me a piece of cr*p all they want. But if you've changed your mind, you've changed your mind. You have rights, and if people want to play around with that, or use whatever rhetoric they want to use to overlook that, it's simply wrong.

While there is no legal obligation for someone in DEP to take their Active Duty Oath, There is a moral obligation to do so.

In fact the only reason that people are not legally required to go is due to current DOD regulations. The contract that someone signs when they enter DEP is a legally binding contract. This is why DOD had to come up with the regulations saying that the contract will not be enforced.

The fact is that if the US Government wanted to enforce the Enlisted Contract, they could. They just choose not to right now because the US Military is an all volunteer force.

Oh and just for your information gabound, the last poster has not been ignored by his recruiter. He stated in a post on the Navy board that his recruiter has been trying to get in touch with him for weeks. He just refuses to answer the phone.

NC1(SW)

.... and I also don't have the time to peruse all these freakin' boards to see what someone else is saying in some other post. I'm just responding to this one thread. So if you want to "call me out" on something I'm wrong about, feel free. But again, you bring up this issue of morals. We can go back and forth on "morals" all day (which isn't going to happen), but the fact remains that applicants in the DEP are not obligated, and that's all he was trying to find out. Either they're obligated or they're not. It doesn't matter that the government is "not choosing" to enforce such a contract at this time. If that time ever comes, or the rules change, then yeah, folks need to know that there's no way out of it once they sign the thing. My Marine recruiter tried to pull that same morals crap on me more than 10 years ago. Oh, and don't forget the "You're waisting taxpayer's money by me sending you to the physical and all the processing you did." I told him to kiss my a**, I was a taxpayer, and as far as I'm concerned I paid my own way for my physical, so what? Bottom line: I realize I know NOTHING about you Stec, but it's hard for me to relate with anyone who goes around preaching morals all the time (at least regarding to THIS thread, by the way!), because no one is perfect. Especially considering the fact that a lot of military recruiters are the nastiest scum on the earth, so what right do they have to preach about morals? They don't. But.. ah forget it.

Dude just get your a** out the DEP and never look back.

I was not trying to call you out. I was just trying to bring the fact to your attention.

You said "If they want to treat you like they don't know you all of a sudden, he**, turn around and treat them the exact same way." I was just pointing out that they had tried to get into contact with him. He was the one that broke off all ties.

You are right, no one is perfect. I do not "preach" morals, but I do believe strongly that a man's word should mean something, enforceable or not. Again, right or wrong, this is my opinion.

This is not an attack on you, but I am glad that you were not my recruiter. I went to bootcamp because I thought I had to. If I was given a way out I may have taken it.I had thoughts of not going, but I went because I felt I had to. If someone told me that I was not "obligated" to go, I my have never had the success that I have enjoyed for 10 years in the Navy. I may never have met my wife and gotten married. I may never have had my daughter. I may never have become a recruiter and helped to enrich the lives of 100's of people. I did those things because my recruiter cared enough to explain to me that my word was binding. He told me that their is honor in keeping your word, and you should break it for no one.

I am a United States Sailor because I took the Oath of Enlistment on July 19th, 1994 (that oath swore me into DEP). As far as I was concerned, my Active Duty oath was only a formality and I am a better man because of it.

NC1(SW)

Good for you...

i am in the dep for the army reserves do they still have to let me out of my contract, is it the same rules as active army and other branches