'T’was the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pizzed. He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks. I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!
I've busted my butt for damn near a year, Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear? The old lady b/tches cause I work late at night. The elves want more money--The reindeer all fight.
Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids. Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS. And just when I thought that things would get better Those a-holes from the IRS sent me a letter, They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny Who the hell ever sent Santa some money?
And the kids these days--they all are the pits They want the impossible--Those mean little sh/ts I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds, Assembling dolls with the arms, legs and heads I made a ton of yo yo's, and see no request for them, They want computers and I-pods, thinking I’m IBM!
Flying through the air...dodging the trees Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees. I'm quitting this job, there's just no enjoyment I'll sit on my fat *** and draw unemployment.
There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason, I found me a blonde. I'm going SOUTH for the season.
