I am a loser, poser wannabe and a jackass to boot. This is the first and only time that I have ever done anything like this.
When I wrote my post, I worded it very carefully. I didn't think that it would cause this type of a firestorm. About 90% of the stuff I put on there is real. I did have 3 ARCOM's, 4 AAM's, and the other ribbons. I was in ROTC for a short while, and I did receive my Eaker award when I got to Colorado Springs Cadet Squadron, about a year after I left CAP as a cadet. I did earn my Ranger Challenge tab and was also awarded a Marauder tab in college (University of Oregon). I told my Bn SGM,a former Ranger Batt. 1SG, that I wanted to be a Ranger. He gave me a tab and told me to go and earn it.
I left college to be a Ranger. I got an enlistment contract with the RGV4 and took the 13F MOS to get it. I didn't make it to RIP. I was then stationed at Fort Carson from Dec. 1996 to June 1998 with 3/29 FA. I also made a pit stop in Kuwait from Sept. 97-Dec. 97. I got my orders for Korea while I was there. I was with the 1/506 (AA) IN in Korea stationed at Camp Greaves and Camp Giant. I reenlisted to come back to Ft. Carson because of my ex-wife (another stupid move). I was given a pair of Korean jump wings with a hat and my rank on it from a KATUSA. Upon returning to Carson, I had one more chance at Ranger School. I didn't get a slot. My Army career and my marriage were quickly going down the tubes and I attempted suicide three times before I was put out of the Army for a "personality disorder." I was fully intent on waiting out the two years before I could reenlist with the sole goal of getting to Ranger School. Then, I got Lautenburged.
I honestly feel that I have let everyone down. I grew up wanting to be like my dad, Gordon McIntosh, Terry Clark, and some of the other guys that I knew and greatly respected. I remember seeing my dreams crash as the RIP instructors picked up the other guys in front of 1/507th. From there, my life went downhill. I have never been a true Army Ranger, and never deserved to be. I wanted the brotherhood and the chance to feel that I was part of something special. I now realize that I am simply a sack of cow poo festering below a field latrine.
To every Ranger who has ever served, I give you my deepest apology. To those who have died, on the battlefield and elsewhere, my deepest respect. To anyone who tries to fake the tab, realize that you will eventually be hunted and your true colors will show. For anyone trying to deceive now, come straight. You know who you are and you know that you didn't do what you say you did. A true Ranger knows a brother and can sniff the BS you lay down. To everyone I have let down, I don't know what to say. I am simply a moron for thinking that I was something I am not.
With the deepest respect I add:
Rangers Will Always Lead the Way
Personal note to "Airox8:" You are a true inspiration to all of your students. Teach them to be the best. Lord knows I could have learned a lot from you.
