well Im new to the FRG thing and I want to know whats the benefit of being involved with your FRG while hubby is deployed , I get emails all the time asking me to join them for the meetings and stuff but due to work im too tired to participate,So what exactly is benefit of keeping a comunication with the FRG leaders,do they get info of our deploy units/ husbands that they share with spouses, cause if they do Im gonna make the effort to go.I just want to know everything thats going on with my DH, so is it a good thing to go to the meetings.Before my hubby deploy he never wanted me to get involved.Please enlighten me on this issue.

I answered this in the Mob & Dep area until I found this one posted again here. Please do not spam the boards with multiple postings such as this. Below is my answer copied and pasted from the other thread.


Yes, they will have information on the unit.

Some FRGs can be quite clique-ish and that is why they have a bad rep and many don't want to get involved with them.

They usually do different things during deployments that can help the time pass. I had a lot of fun one month when we went to Clay Play to paint pottery. They usually have Easter egg hunts for the kids and that type of thing.

Go and see what you think and then decide if you want to continue. Ask if they send out an email newsletter too.

Sgt Mom

Why did your husband not want you to get involved with the FRG before he deployed? Does he still feel that way now that he is deployed?

is not he didnt wanted me to get involved is that he said alot of FRGs have bad rep

SOME FRG's have a bad rep due to the people running it. It's not always the case though. I've not been involved with one yet that isn't doing a great job. Some are just ignorant on policy and procedures as well.

Get involved as much as you're comfortable doing. Don't be afraid to say "no thank you" to something either.
There's a lot of info that can be passed on thru the FRG when you don't have a lot of communication with your spouse. Even though I talked to my love several times a week, I still went to darn near every meeting. It was a great way for me to get to know the family members that my love talked about on a regular basis, it kept me informed on general things, etc.
It also was a way for me to find another spouse who was in need of help in some form or other. Whether it be child care, short on cash for groceries, or helping them dig their car out of the snow---there's always someone who's struggling either privately or publicly. Was just a way for me personally to connect with a younger wife and help another person out.

You can't judge the FRG on what your dh says. He isn't the one that went to the meetings, got the information, etc. He is the one that heard stories from the other guys he works with. And a lot of time it is just that, stories. It doesn't mean they are true. If I had $1 for every story I have heard over the years about the FRG, the Ombudsman, the command, the military, I would be a millionaire by now several times.

You have to be the one that judges it for yourself. Yes there can be problems and it can seem like it is a click but unless you go you will never know. They do have information that you might not find out or get anywhere else. They do have gatherings for dinner, events, etc... Every FRG varies depending on who is the Chairperson.

Don't underestimate the ability to see past the ones that give it a bad rep and possibly be able to find friends, too. We live on a small post with very little housing so most people live off-post, so the only people we know are our next door neighbors (we do live on post). If we have an FRG, I haven't heard from them, and sometimes I get lonely enough that I would very willingly put up with some BS to find one or two good friends. I can already foresee that this will "ouch" even more when DH is actually deployed, talk about lonely!

I have been a member (and FRG Leader) of several FRG's. Some were great and some were nightmares. As the others have said, you cannot judge an FRG by what other people have said. You need to see for yourself. I would suggest going. You can get a feel of how things are in that particular FRG and decide on your own.

I have told myself whenever we PCS that I would never get involved in another FRG based on some past experiences. But you know what? When there is an FRG at my new location, I always join in spite of myself. Sometimes it is a good thing and sometimes I say to myself, "why did I do this?" It is worth the trouble. You can get so much information and support from a good one. Who knows, you might make some lasting friendships!

As a past FRG Leader, I have experienced the struggle of recruiting members. Some FRG's, I had to do most everything myself because I couldn't get anyone to join.

By joining, not only are you getting great info, making friends and getting out of the house, you are helping your husband's unit. We did car washes, bake sales, craft sales, family member day trips, etc. The proceeds helped pay for FRG events and we made care packages to the unit deployed.

OK, that is my speech. I am finished my recruiting session!