Okay folks, with all the stuff going on, lets not forget the real reason where all here.

I would love to hear some stories from you Vets, or from those of you that have talked with Vets, I have many such stories, course I spend most of my time with Vets.

You tell me yours, I will share mine.

One that comes to mind right off, is the time I was sitting around the resturant table with about 6 or 7 old Vietnam Vets, not long into the morning, we ended up there for over 8 hours just talking.

They started in about the crap detail, I have seen the movies portray it, but to hear it from these guys made all the more real. They laughed at how the new guys would get stuck doing it, or some guy getting into trouble.

One of them told me that most everytime he was about to get his turn, he would set up a newbie and let him get stuck doing it. He would wait for someone in charge to be going around and get the kid in trouble.

It was then that his best friend made him tell of the time he did that and the new kid whipped his butt.

They told stories from being really scared, to funny, to mad, to some really horrible stuff that I am priviledge to be allowed to sit in on.

Most vets wont talk with non vets about that kind of stuff, so I consider it an honor that they trust me that much. I have gained a new respect since meeting these guys and what they have gone through.

So what stories do you have??

Just to clear this up, I am not asking for anything personal, or something you dont wish to say.

Tell me some of the jokes you played.

Tell of the hardships, let us non vets that have never served hear from you. What about Iraq, what are some things they dont show on the news??

Whatever you feel like sharing is good, make us laugh, make us stop and thank of just how much you have been through, let us share in your stories, so we may never forget that our troops are always deserving of our respect.

Thank you.

quote:

Originally posted by THANKUVETS:
Just to clear this up, I am not asking for anything personal, or something you dont wish to say.

Tell me some of the jokes you played.

Uh-oh!! I'd duck if I were you. You've done called in a Comedic Airstrike, the likes of which may not be seen again for some time to come.


Tell of the hardships, let us non-vets that have never served hear from you. What about Iraq, what are some things they don't show on the news??

Whatever you feel like sharing is good, make us laugh, make us stop and think of just how much you have been through, let us share in your stories, so we may never forget that our troops are always deserving of our respect.

Thank you.

Dude, I have been sitting with these guys for months now, and I cant wait, they have had me rolling and laughing so hard I have left literally in pain before.

I love it, I trully do.

One of the best stories I have recieved over the years was last year, most of you that know me, know why I came here all those years ago. I was looking for something on my cousin.

Last year, I finally found a guy that was there at the same base, he only met Johnny once, but knew of him by reputation. He talked of how no matter what else was going on, Johnny was always messing around with the Chinook he flew on. Yes, I know the nickname you guys called it.

He sent me pictures of the base, where Johnny was at and what group he flew with, They had White Dolphins on the tail, the ship he was on was called Balls One.

After all the years, it was one of the most touching days when I received the reports in the mail, I owe this guy alot.

So yeah, anything about Nam especially is great, but I love to hear from all the wars, or hell, dont have to be wars, anytime. Active duty now and past too.

Like needing prop wash, or sending some new kid for a left handed hammer, 50 feet of flightline.

I love that stuff.

When we, Surgical Team One from San Diego, were on the flight home after our deployment to the Persian Gulf, we were together in the back of the plane (we flew commercially, on GTRs) and most of the passengers had deplaned at LAX. We were about 20 minutes out from Lindbergh Field and decided we were going to play a joke on our mobilization officer, the one who sent us over there. We all had bought the headdresses and decided that we would put them on and wear them off the plane. We hadn't shaved in like a week so we looked pretty scruffy.

The stewardess walked to where we were and her eyes got big. We explained who we were and that this was all a joke on LTJG Farris from Balboa. She understood and laughed about it. A few minutes later, the Captain came on over the 1MC and told us the weather (this was about two weeks before Christmas, '87) and then identified us and thanked us for our job. The rest of the passengers applauded (to explain, we had been deployed in a Rapid Deployment status after USS Stark was hit, although it was a couple of months later. BUMED decided that they needed a surgical team over there and since we had recently stood down from WestPac, we were still considered C-1 status. So we drew the duty.)

After we arrived at the jetway, we were the last to deplane. We expected families to be there and LTJG Farris. What we DIDN'T expect was that the Admiral, dressed in his full dress uniform, would be there to greet us and make a presentation to us (a certificate for each one of us and a certificate redeemable for 1 week of basket leave.) My skipper saw him standing there and blushed bright red (as did the other officers and team members, who were all quite hungover from the last night in the Gulf Hotel in Bahrain). LTJG Farris looked like he was going to be suddenly ill. The Admiral, though busted out laughing and when the family members figured out what was going on, they did, too. We got our basket leave and certificates, the team members left with their families, but since I was solo in San Diego, I rode home with LTJG Farris. I got an earful the whole way back to Balboa until I got to the barracks. Then he grinned and said that we got him good, but in the end, he got us, too.

We had a guy in basic that never let a broom handle be far from his hand. Just as keeping your weapon within hands reach this guy had his broom. When ever a Drill Sargent walked in the barracks, there he was sweeping.

With all the stuff going on in those hectic times of running around and lack of sleep it took me a while to figure out what was up.

By always looking like he was busy he almost never got jumped on by a Drill Sargents or picked for details.

Good stuff.

OP, we have a guy in the shop I work at, always waiting for the boss to show up so he can look busy, and yes, it works too..

quote:

Like needing prop wash, or sending some new kid for a left handed hammer, 50 feet of flightline.

I love that stuff.

when i was @ FT Riley one of the older guys sent a newbie to get a fan belt buckle for a HEMMT. he spent the whole day trying to find one, each person he asked sent him to someone else. finally at the end of the day they let him off the hook by explaining that it was a gag.

i also have story from FT Drum (NG summer camp)about the infamous Ranger Situp.

We sent a guy to the boiler room to bring up a bucket of steam.

One of the best pranks (or stories) comes in the version of this. We had a new guy in division that wasn't exactly a rocket scientist (though, he had a computer science degree). Anyway, there is a thing that CA Division does as a quarterly check (I think it is quarterly). It is a direct interaction between the MK116 operators and the TMs and is called firing air-slugs. Basically, all it is is firing LP air through the torp tubes. Ah, but that is where the boring a drab turn into the fun and stupid.

Essentially, we tell a bootcamp nub to put on a battle helmet, a flak jacket, tuck his pant-legs into his socks (like battle stations), button that good 'ol top button, wear any other stuff that is up to interpretation of the individual (we got a guy to wear arm floaties), etc. Basically, his job is to catch the air slug. So, we give him the equivalent of a butterfly net with a 10 foot reach. And, he stands next to the torp tube ready to catch the air slug because they are extremely expensive and if you don't catch it you can go to Captain's Mast. And, the funny thing is that the 116 never fires the slug as soon as the operator hits the button. It is usually with a 5 second area of uncertainty.

Then, of course, there is the good 'ol cranking down the Mast while pulling into SD Bay.

There is much more, but I am tired and I fear that I will be censored anyway. Maybe tomorrow.

Hmm? Tomorow... Shoot, I could probably tell you a good story about a burrito and a vajinal (once again, censorship) orifice and the fight that ensued. Or, I could tell you about how an aggregate of poop objects (sea pickles) could swim laps across the deck like Michael Phelps at the 2004 Summer Olympic Games and were bet on like racehorses at the Derby. Or, I could probably just give one story about Phuket and all others would pale in comparison. Which one is your pleasure?

I am a sick puppy, so the burrito and the orifice sounds pretty interesting.

I was told once that one of the guys I ride was set up to go to a boom boom ville, saw this really nice and pretty Vietnamese girl there, payed went to the room, lights out, dark and his buddies sent an older lady in, okay they described her as uglier than the azz of a baboon.

At fort Sheridan, IL the MPs would put a manikin in a car to make people slow down. They had a name for him...Officer Tim.

Since we worked a lot with the MPs we thought a prctical joke was in order.

The MPs would park the car and put officer tim in place before sunrise.

We Waited untill they were gone and set-up officer tim with a box of Dunkin Doughnuts and the daily paper. We then photographed the scene and drafted a letter to the installation newspaper about our shock and dimay over the conduct of an MP. We dropped the letter with photographic evidence into the mail laughing all the way.

To our shock, the MPs did not take our little prank well. After returning from PT that moring we found that the MPs had called in CID to investigate the case of vandalism. The post paper did not run our editorial and turned over the evidence to the MPs.

They never did acuse us of anything...But they never were very friendly with us after that.

NOW that is just freaking hiliarous man...

quote:

Originally posted by PeteCDR:
We sent a guy to the boiler room to bring up a bucket of steam.

The $64 dollar question is, did he actually grab the bucket and run off to the boiler room??

In desert Storm one time, I was taking a shower and my buds thought it would be funy to take all my clothes, boots and towell back to the tent for me before i finished my freezing cold shower. Keep in mind its like 1600 hours (I worked night operations). So, instead of yelling and griping, i just casually walked back to my tent, in all my glory, acting like I belonged there in my birthday suite.

then theres that one time I showed up in formation wearing only mickey mouse underwear, but thats another story.

GRAYMAN

OH no, what happened to ya on that one... That sounds like a good story..

Told a friend about his thread, he said to put this on one here.

I have yet to get him to make the sound, but he says there is a lizard over there that makes a sound like

F YOU.... Any of you Vets know of this???

I've heard of the FYOU lizard, but it was in Nam not Iraq. (I'm not saying i was in Nam, just the books I've read). But as to me, I never seen nor heard the FYOU lizard in Iraq or Kuwait, or Saudi for that matter.

Like i mentioned before, I worked in operations at night. One morning, in the TM yard, I was sleeping and the SCUD alert goes off and everyone is running around (this was before it was a joke and people would rather go get their cameras instead of MOPP suites). I was so frickin tired I just layed there putting my gear on. By the time the all clear was given, I was dressed in MOPP, so I undressed, and got back in the rack. The frickin CO calls for a formation (idiot), and I just didnt care. So, I showed up in my mickey mouse underwear and boots. I was in 1st squad so I was in the front. The CO (a female BTW) saw me, she stopped, asked what I was doing and I replied that i was standing in formation as ordered. Thats when everyone really noticed what I was doing and began laughing. The CO was so pizzed she just left the formation. I went back into the tent and crashed. Later on my PSG said that it was the funniest thing he had seen in 20 years and that he'll remember it the rest of his life adn that i wasnt to do it again.

Then theres HET surfing in desert storm through 7th CORP area.

GRAYMAN

Once at Ft. Bragg on a night jump (they were all night jumps) my chute opened up and was osculating me so bad I didn't have time to get it under control before I went face first into the side of the chute of the guy coming down beside me. I spread eagle and bounced out just to have him drop below me and me drift over the top of him and then come down on top of his chute. So there I was hundreds of feet up in the air ridding on top another guys chute in the dark of the night. In retrospect, very cool. As I ran off the top of his chute, his chute stole my air and my chute collapsed sending me shooting toward the earth. It reopened but by then I was nearing tree top level and didn't have time to lower my gear. All I had time to do was assume the position and ride my ruck in. My adrenalin was pumping so hard that when I hit it felt only like being hit by pillows. After I got my heart to beat back inside my chest I got up no worse for wear and continued on with the mission. Just another day at the office.