is lying to me about it. I've been on these boards before and it's been awhile since I've been on. For those of you who remember me, my spouse (Navy Reservist) volunteered for an IA deployment a few years back but told me his unit was being deployed (absolutely no truth to that - to this day his unit has yet to be deployed). He again is volunteering for another IA, but is lying to me about and telling me the same story - his unit is being deployed. Where/who/how can I talk to about this matter? I don't mind him going (obviously that's why he joined the military) and I told him that. I told him just don't lie about it. Anyone have any ideas? Please help! Thank you.

the person you need to be talking to is HIM.. as in asking WHY he feels the need to lie to you. perhaps he is concerned that you will consider his volunteering to mean he doesn't love you, or is running away or any number of silly reasons.

I did talk to him and ask him why he's lying. The problem is that he's denying the fact that he is lying. I truly believe he has some serious mental issues. Not only does he lie about his miliary life, he also joined numerous online dating services in the last year (or more) and lies about himself on there, too!

After reading your second post, that’s a little bit different that what I thought on the first post.

On the other hand, I have seen with couples where the deploying man/woman has lied about going IA, saying it was a unit deployment for reasons of marriage/relationship issues.

Myself, my last relationship I was told if I volunteered for an IA tour, she'd leave. Was gonna lie about it but figured that I didn't need to be put through that type of relationship. Well I'm single and happy now.

Anyways, some folks I know have lied to their spouse about IA tours on the grounds of relationship difficulties with many deployments under there belts, and a ton of time away from each other.

Now I won't say it's right or wrong to lie to yoru spouce about it simply because it's NOT OUR business, nor the forum MOD's buisness. Too many variables and reasons. That’s something the COUPLES sort out.

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