Has anyone else got the same problem my husband and I have? We can't really lose weight at all unless we eat small portions throughout the day and walk some.

Before Drew left for boot camp, he was exercising some each day. He didn't lose much weight at all. When he came back, he had lost over 30 lbs. I was surprised that he was able to accomplish this...then I found out that he's only been eating a full meal (larger portions) once or twice every two days and then just having snack-sized meals throughout the rest of the time...and I understood.

My body is the same way. If I eat 3 square meals a day, I may stay the same weight or put it back on. Same is true if I walk a lot, only I don't put the weight on...I'll lose a little at a time and then put it back on a pound or two at a time. If I cut back on my meal portions a lot and reduce them to the size of a large snack for me and then just eat whenever I'm hungry throughout the day, I lose more weight than eating right and exercising combined. I make sure to take a multi-vitamin to regulate whatever my body doesn't get from a scanty-meal-diet.

It is just really frustrating...because this really is the only thing that works for either of us, but everyone else would be like, "NO!! You're STARVING yourselves!!" And it's just...ugh. There is only one older adult who sees this kind of eating as healthy... The way she phrased it is that here in America, we have "fed the baby" and we are constantly doing that. But if we would just "listen" to our bodies and just eat when we needed to (when we are hungry) and eat what we are hungry for, we wouldn't be in as much of a bad shape as we are.

What do you guys think?

Sometimes that works for people - but the key is that no matter "how" you eat, you have to watch the # of calories you're taking in. This was actually in a magazine I was reading last night, because of the "myth" that just the very act of eating smaller meals more often boosts metabolism. That is not the case if you eat 400 calories 6 times a day - just like it isn't if you eat 800 calories 3 times a day. For people who do better eating smaller amounts throughout the day - which you and your husband are, and honestly I think I am, too, because I tend to graze, and get too full sitting at one meal, then that's definitely the better option.

I agree with your friend - the simple problem is that we don't stop eating when we're not hungry. We eat because we like the taste, or because we're bored, or emotional/hormonal, etc.

I will say one thing - and I'm the pot calling the kettle black here - you shouldn't HAVE to take a vitamin to make up for what you're not eating (unless you're in childbearing years/pregnant and taking a prenatal for folic acid and iron). Not saying that taking vitamins is a bad idea, but it shouldn't be considered a valid replacement for the basic food groups. Make sure one or two of your small meals has a lean protein, snack on fruits instead of crackers, etc. Or, if you decide to give the ol' square 3 a try again, then be sure to bulk up on lean proteins and fiber-rich foods, as those will make you full faster. I was looking at diet meal plans, and found that for example, with a lot of cereals I was encouraged to eat 2 servings at breakfast (keeping in mind this isn't Lucky Charms, this was like cheerios, shredded wheat, plain oatmeal, etc) to boost fiber intake and keep me feeling full through the day.

For me, I also think that a downfall of sitting and eating 3 meals is the tendency to drink more calories. I'm not going to sit on the couch drinking 12 oz of soda, but it's easy to do that to wash down a big meal.

Good luck! I've got a major goal of losing 10 lbs before we visit home next month, so I'm with ya on the dieting adventure.

Thanks! Good to know we're not the only ones out there.

My biggest issue is that I hate for people to "know" about it... my mom is a nurse, so she won't shut up about "That's fattening. So is that. You need this *holds up food she knows I hate*" She can get very annoying in that she watches what I eat for me...when it's my responsibility. I just want to be like BACK OFF!! It just puts a lot more stress on me while I'm trying to take care of it on my own.

I am not very good about allowing people to really "be involved" with me. I don't even call it dieting really...because I just refuse to do it the way other people do or become obsessed over it like they are. I want to lose the weight, yes, but if I don't it's not the end of the world...

Agreed on all of the above.

And I think moms are just like that. They don't want us to struggle/have self esteem issues/not be healthy/etc. But sometimes I just really want her to be quiet. If she tells me I need to shop for low sodium food (after I've already told her I do like 4 times), I may scream.

Lol, I totally understand.

Oh, and about the multi-vitamin, I don't exactly use it as a supplement for food...but rather as a booster. I also have issues where "that time of the month" can be extremely painful if I'm not on the vitamin. It just insures that I get all of the nutrients I need and then some.

It is true that you have to watch your caloric intake when eating many times a day, just like when you only eat a few times a day. 2400 Calories is 2400 Calories and, unless you're 7' tall (a bit of an exageration), you will gain weight consuming that many calories. The thing with eating multiple meals a day is that it is easier to feel full that way which makes it easier to reduce your caloric intake.

I eat two packages of instant oatmeal for breakfast or two packages of instant grits (I know, no self-respecting Southerner eats instant grits but it just takes too long the non-instant way) and I'm fine for the next 3-4 hours. That is between 210-300 Calories for the meal. This holds me until lunch quite well.

So, if you consume about 300 Calories per meal and eat five times a day then there is a good chance that you will lose weight. Of course, regular exercise (even just a vigorous walk) will help the weight come off faster.

If you can, wean off of any soft drinks and alcohol and go toward water. Water helps you feel full and has 0 calories. Flavored water doesn't count because it has calories added.

Now, if I could just convince myself that I don't need burritos, tacos and pizza then I would be in great shape.

I have to agree with theainjmtant about the vitamins. Getting your nutrients from their natural source is more beneficial to you than getting them in pill form. However, I will say that some people's bodies can't absorb nutrients from food properly, or there is a medical issue involved. So for some, including myself, a multivitamin is necessary for your health.

I do however understand your frustration. Ever since my high school days I have been very strict about calories and what I eat. The max I eat a day is 1200 calories, and that's rounding up. I was able to lose weight taking in only 400 calories a day for a month but I got sick and was told by the doctor I had to eat more than that. Sure enough the weight came right back on though.
I have a disorder that is the cause of my weight and why it's so hard to lose it even with desperate acts of trying. You and your hubby may have some medical issues you're not aware of, or some that are just slight and may need fine tuning. No matter what you are not alone by any means. I often find, and I swear this is not an exaggeration: the harder I try to lose weight is when I gain it. If I don't focus so much on exercising or what I'm eating that's when my weight stabilizes. Makes NO sense to me whatsoever but it has made me learn that every body is different--and drastically in some cases. You may want to talk with your PCM to find out if there are any lurking medical issues. I've seen 4 nutritionists and am now on another doctor prescribed diet along with various meds and still not having any luck! I sincerely hope that you and hubby are not in the same boat. It may just be something minor that's preventing you from losing weight in a more normal fashion.
*Please note, this response was typed using spacing to separate paragraphs. Despite my efforts and intentions sometimes my posts on these forums do not appear as typed and therefore may not appear with paragraph spacing. This is a technical issue that I have not been able to resolve however I apologize for the occurrence.*

One thing I was told just last week when I was in the Doc's office that I wasn't aware of: your height and age factors into what your caloric intake should be. --I didn't know that. According to my Doc: at 5ft 4in and 38 years old, I should only be consuming a max of 1200 calories a day. I consume less than that, I worked out 4-5 days a week for 6 months (until my back started up again)....I saw ZERO results. I'm talking I walked an average of 2 miles in 15 minutes, then jumped on the Devil Machine for another 20 minutes, then hit my weights....nothing. Something is wrong with that picture right there. Yet all my blood work comes back 'within normal range'...

Another thing to marinate on too: you intake must be less than your output in order to lose weight. You can certainly intake less calories, but if your output is less than that...won't matter. You won't lose anything.

Ya know, you bring up a very good point there bobbysangelwife, well, actually 2. One is that your input of calories must be less than your output in order to lose weight. The other is that just because someone's labs come back "within normal range" doesn't mean what the doctors imply. For example, the "normal range" for a cholesterol test is "0-199". Just because a person's lab results for this shows 198 doesn't mean it's healthy or desired. And those ranges vary from male to female and according to age and other contributing factors, yet the lab results don't usually annotate that. Especially in the examples we're seeing here, when the expenditure of calories DOES exceed the intake and yet there is no weight loss, that this indicates something is wrong.
Muscle weighs more than fat, we all know this. So by exercising you're building muscle and losing fat, which often means your weight may actually increase but your body fat is likewise decreasing. Even considering that, if there is no indication of weight loss, whether by number of pounds or of how the clothes fit, then there is still obviously something contributing to the problem.
*Please note, this response was typed using spacing to separate paragraphs. Despite my efforts and intentions sometimes my posts on these forums do not appear as typed and therefore may not appear with paragraph spacing. This is a technical issue that I have not been able to resolve however I apologize for the occurrence.*